Tangled up in blue: Wicked NOT Dead: Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

Rebecca

Forty-eight hours later the house was once again filled with sweaty hardbodied working men and nothing could have made Rebecca happier. Alcide had shown up before dawn to coordinate with Mason a sign of dedication that was meant to impress and did just that. It was just after noon and men were coming out of the house toward the picnic tables she had had delivered and placed yesterday under the trees on the lake side of the property. Alcide had mentioned on the phone the day before that most of the men would probably want to eat on site and Rebecca wanted them to have a nice place to sit and cool off while they took their breaks. She had also gone to the local nursery and found Mrs. Whitstaff a championship gardener who along with her husband owned a landscaping business. She had practically jumped out of her skin at the thought of at getting at Rebecca's land. Rebecca rewarded her exuberance by hiring her company to do all of the landscaping and gardening on the spot. The Whitstaff lawn and gardening company truck pulled into her driveway not to long after Alcide did and while she wanted to be in on the conversation between the boys that didn't happen, instead she found herself sitting at one of the picnic tables drinking coffee and eating danish with a white haired couple who finished each others sentences and had found real contentment in their second careers.

They had a love for the earth and each other and it was nice to see two people genuinely happy with one another decades into a marriage. They watched as Mason's crew left to go to ground and Mrs. Whitstaff jokingly asked if there was any chance they would accidently dig any of them up. Rebecca just about choked on her coffee when she said it and then began to laugh uncontrollably. She assured her that there was no chance of that happening but it would be quite a sight to see if it did. Mr. Whitstaff had just shaken his head at his wife and asked how Rebecca had come to be friends with so many of the undead. Neither of them seemed particularly alarmed by their presence. Mr. Whitstaff envied them. He was having a harder time that his wife with his ever increasing age. He had used up his youth to get to the comfortable point he was at now and sometimes when he found that he could not longer do things as easily or not at all he wished for the life he had now but in the body he once had. The only downside to being a vampire he thought was not being able to feel the warm sun on your face. Other than that it seemed like a pretty nice lot to have. Mrs. Whitstaff thought that there were way to many good looking men hanging about and what she would do if she was still the hot little number she had been in her twenties. She had just about drooled when Mason had walked over to say goodnight and when Alcide had sat down for a minute to chat and have a cup of coffee. Watching Rebecca with the two men Mrs. Whitstaff couldn't help but wonder if Rebecca was tangled up with both of them. She looked over at her husband and hoped that her new client didn't have a thing for older alive men as well. She took her husbands arm and looked at him lovingly she still thought of her husband as quite the catch. Rebecca had smiled at that train of thought. She had walked through the property with the twosome listening to their ideas and their vision for what the land could be. Mr. Whitstaff wanted to bring men out to work on the trees and the underbrush immediately and asked her for copies of the plans of the house and pool area so he and his landscape architect could get to work. She had taken Mrs Whitstaff down to the plot for the garden and they discussed which vegetables would be best for this time of the year. Rebecca also explained to her that she wanted an herb garden and had a list that needed to be planted. They suggested building a small greenhouse/shed to house any materials needed and asked if piping could be laid to make irrigating the garden easier. It was just before noon when the couple had left full of ideas and chomping at the bit to get started. Rebecca was more than happy to let them have at it.

She stood in the drive her hands in the back pockets of her jeans watching as they drove away. Such an adorable couple so happy and in love. They had what everyone dreamed of. A touch of melancholy tightened her throat and her eyes felt threatened by tears. She tried to bite them both back with deep breaths. But as much as she tried the feeling growing inside her could not be de-swayed. Her hands started to cramp, her heart started to race and she was doubled over by an uncontrollable pain in her stomach. She walked slowly away from the house trying to look normal as she could conscious of the men joking nearby and of the eyes watching her from the window. She knew who was watching her and he could tell something was wrong. He was moments away from coming out to check on her. She just needed to hold it together until she got to the trailer. She got to the steps and climbed them quickly and white-knuckled the door open letting it slam behind her. Do not go there right now Rebecca. Do not fall apart over things that can not be undone. Do not let it take you Rebecca. She kept saying reassuring things in her head but the pain would not go away. It would not be stopped. It crippled her and Rebecca fell to her knees and let it take her. She laid on the floor engulfed in sorrow. She cried until she thought there was no more liquid left in her body but after a few minutes of quiet the sobbing would start again. She screamed and she cursed and she punched the floor and asked over and over again why? So many wrong turns so many missed opportunities. She'd let herself be lead by forces bigger than herself and she had ended up with exactly what she had always told them she'd end up with. Nothing. She had warned, begged and pleaded and then she had wavered and done exactly what had been expected of her. She would have been punished either way. She had known that but she had hoped that maybe she was wrong. Maybe things would not come to be as she had foreseen them. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. But she has been right and they had paid and she was alone. She had been left behind. To pick up the pieces. To live with the guilt. To desolve in the fear and the hate. The clock kept ticking and days were replaced by months and then years and now it was only in moments such as these that she let out the anguish. It was always there. Hiding. Waiting until the next time she felt anything. For more than half a decade love and conpanionship had been out of the question. Seeing such hope and devotion in others had sent her back down the rabbit hole. She wasn't sure when she had fallen asleep. She had been staring at the ceiling calmly petting Saffy and Emmy who had come to offer their support and comfort. Visions of another life passed before her. Faces and places. Gentle caresses and whispered promises. She wanted to go back to that time. She wanted to remember all of the moments that had been pushed to the corners of her mind. She wished it and then everything went black.

She came back to the now at the sound of banging, a crash and then of two voices.

"I called she said she wasn't feeling well and would be staying inside and resting. I didn't want to bother her so I didn't come down. I should have man. I am sorry" Alcide sounded worried.

When did she call him? She didn't remember picking up the phone.

" No Alcide you couldn't have known. She gets really bad headaches and the only thing that helps is rest."

Two familiar arms pushed their way beneath her and she was lifted off the floor and pressed to Mason's chest. She opened her eyes and looked at him his pale face even whiter than normal. His jaw set hard and his eyes filled with sadness. She felt the pain starting to grown once again and took a quick look at Alcide. He stood in the pale light of the doorway. Lost and unsure what to do. She reached out to him and told him she was sorry she worried him. He took her hand briefly as she buried her face in Mason's chest.

" The cat's Mason."

He asked Alcide to close the door and then carried her back to the bedroom. Laying her gently on the bed he took off her shoes and she unbuttoned her jeans. In one quick movement he slipped those off which made her smile despite herself.

He sent her a "There's my girl" and faintly smiled back.

He pulled the covers around her and then lowered himself next to the bed so that his face was just inches from hers.

" Darling you really must time your little breakdowns better" He caressed her cheek and pushed the matted hair away from her face. Her eyes grew wide and filled again with tears. She grabbed Mason's hand and tried to lift herself up. How horrible it must have been for him. He had felt everything she had that afternoon and could do nothing about it.

" I am so sorry Mason sooo..." He pushed her gently back onto the pillow.

" None of that Rebecca. You just lay here and get some rest" He stood up and went into the bathroom bringing back a glass of water.

" I want you to take these and I want no protests. Tonight you need something strong and man made." He handed her two pills and she took them wordlessly downing the glass of water with them.

" I was with them Mason and it was so nice. It's been such a long time I didn't want to...." She didn't finish her thought as sleep overtook her once again. Mason went out to talk to Alcide who was still standing by the door in the living room. She felt him reluctantly leave and then Mason come back into the room and laid down next to her on the bed until dawn.

The next day when she awoke in stages and everything was still quite cloudy when her bladder forced her to get up out of the bed before it burst. She cursed at it until she realized it had been over twenty four hours since the last time it had been emptied and then apologized for mistreating it. Her Mother always warned her about regretting holding it in later in life. She washed her hands and ran handfuls of cold water over her face trying to clear out the fog and bring herself back from the brink. She ran herself a very hot bath and threw her crumpled clothes at the open hamper missing with her top and almost hitting Emmy who had been braver than Saffy by coming into the bathroom instead of peaking around the door. The water was steaming when she tiptoed her way in slowly letting each piece of her get used to the hot liquid. She was completely numb so as it hit the heat it started to tingle and come back to life. The water smelled of Lavender and Eucalyptus and it felt good to wash off the blue funk of the day before. She sat there until the water had long gone cold slowly putting all the pieces back into their compartments. Everything in it's place, everything in it's own time. Everything will be okay. Her life was now and she had things to do. She rinsed off under the shower and washed her hair and tied it up in a towel turban. She slipped on her favorite robe and a pair of slippers and padded off towards the living room a cat under each foot.

Her cell phone was blinking red and she picked it up from the dinning table before flopping down on the couch to listen to what she had missed. The first call was from her mother. She had felt a disturbance in her balance and was calling to check on her. She rolled her eyes and deleted the call. The next four were from her as well. Delete. Delete. Delete. Delete. Several calls from Marta her store manager in Atlanta. Apparently the one of the canopic jars she had ordered for a client from Egypt had arrived damaged. She needed to know what to do ASAP. A call from Alcide asking if I was okay? If I needed anything? That he had knocked on the door and she didn't answer. Rebecca still didn't remember calling him back. But she must have heard him knock. Must have known he wouldn't take silence for an answer. She had seen the worry and regret in his eyes last night. She would have to find him and reassure him she was okay. The last two calls were from Sookie. She had expected Sookie to come by sooner rather than later so a phone call was showing remarkable restraint on her part. She found it amusing listening to her new neighbor's attempts at making her phone call seem to be about everything but what she really wanted to talk about. She would call her back and set up a meeting. But first she needed some food her stomach was growling loudly at her. She made herself some bacon,eggs and a bagel and once everything was properly seasoned, smeared and squirted she sat down at the table and called back Marta. She talked and ate quickly and once breakfast was devoured and the work crisis diffused Rebecca got dressed and left her damp hair down as she liked the way it curled. She grabbed a pair of shades from kitchen counter on her way out the door and headed towards the house. The sun was particularly bright and the shades were quite welcomed by her stinging eyes.

She could hear the sounds of work being done long before she hoped up the front steps. The house was bumping with some country tunes and she could hear someone singing along at the back of the house. The drywall had been hung in the foyer and the remainder of the old staircase railing had been taken down. Two men were working on repairing the steps and she smiled and said hello to them as she passed by. She peaked her head into the other rooms to see what state they were in. She finally found Alcide in the library. His back to the door looking at some plans. He was wearing jean overalls with just a white tank underneath. His well defined arms gleamed with sweat and they reminded her of a shinny copper penny. She found herself transfixed by his shoulder blades and the curves of them as they disappeared underneath his shirt. She wanted to touch them and trace her fingers all the way down his backside. The perfection of what she could see only made her want to see all of him. She knocked on the wall to get his attention.

" Hello there Mr. Forman. How goes things?" Alcide turned and gave her a quick up and down.

He seemed relieved to see her up and about but still a bit stressed. " Afternoon Rebecca how you feeling today?"

She walked over to the table " Aces Alcide Aces." She gave him a bump with her hip. " I am terribly sorry about last night. I hated for you to see me like that. I have horrible migraines and this one came on so quickly it totally knocked me out"

He looked skeptical but was in no position to question my explanation. " That is what Mason told me."

In his mind he thought about how frail and broken she had looked. The tears in her eyes and the way she had clung to Mason. He thought of how he wished he had trusted his instincts and pushed open that door when he had got no answer in the afternoon. How the sight of her lying on the floor like a rag doll had made his heart stop. He had thought she was dead. She sucked in her breath and left his head. She hadn't thought of what it would look like to someone on the outside of it.

She touched his arm. " I am sorry you had to see that Alcide. I want you to know that I am fine. Really. Please believe that" He looked down at her pale hand on his darkened arm and then back at her face. He held her gaze for more than a minute then nodded his head and looked back at the plans.

" So we have a problem in the kitchen. It seems the cabinets are about a inch off on the far wall here. He pointed to the spot on the plans. All of the cabinets have been ordered and are in waiting to be installed?" He looked at her for confirmation. She nodded her head.

"They are in one of the storage containers in the clearing. How did you discover the discrepancy at this point?

"We were cutting drywall this morning and when I went to measure the space for the last cut something seemed off to me. So I checked. It's off by exactly one inch." His hair flopped down into his face and he brushed it back. He was incredibly cute when he did that she thought.

" Well that bites a big fat wet one now doesn't it? The cabinets are done and in on sight. The custom made stove is being delivered at the end of the week with the rest of the appliances so what would be your suggestion for fixing this issue?

" A smaller door" Alcide stated matter of factly. Where the wall ended the door leading to the back porch began.

" Well there ya go. A smaller door sounds far less expensive to me how bout you?" She thumped the table with her fist as if to seal the deal.

" Hell, no need for a new door" He grinned, glad she had taken the hiccup in stride "We'll just sand down the one we got and it will fit just fine" He gave her a wink.

" Well then problem solved. That was an easy one" She wiped her hand across her brow. " Would you like to take a seat with me under a shady tree outside and celebrate our victory with something cold and wet?"

He ran his hand through his hair again and pocketed his first thought which was quite dirty and had nothing to do with what she had been talking about " Sure. Just give me ten to let Crawfish know what the plan is and I'll join you." Alcide waved her through the door first and they both headed towards the kitchen.

Crawfish was a strawberry blond, wide green eyed perpetually red faced boy man. He was lanky and skinny as a rail, but stronger than anyone could have imagined by looking at him. It was his vocal stylings she had heard when she had come into the house and when she walked into the kitchen he was piping in caulk between the seems of drywall singing "All my ex's live in Texas" at the top of his lungs.

Rebecca chimed in " and that's why I lay my hat in TENNESSEEEEEE..." nearly knocking Crawfish off the step ladder he was standing on. Startled he grabbed the ladder and held on with both hands dropping the caulk gun and looking around to see Rebecca and Alcide in the doorway.

"Ah hell Crawfish your going to kill yourself yet" Alcide shook his head in mock distain. Crawfish was kept around because he busted it better than any man on the crew but he had endeared himself to Alcide by being the comic relief.

Crawfish looked sheepishly at Rebecca and blushed and even brighter shade of red. " Hello Miss Rebecca you a fan of George huh?"

" Well of course he and I go way back and he was singing about Tennessee so I couldn't help myself" Crawfish gave her a big gap toothed grin. " You from Tennessee Miss Rebecca? My Granddad was from Memphis. I used to go there summers. I haven't been there in a while. I'd like to go back"

" Well it's still there in all it's glory and I'm sure it would be happy to see you." She walked past Crawfish giving the ladder a mock shake and said.

" I'll let you get back to work Red cause the big boss man here might dock your pay if you sit around flirting with the homeowner all afternoon."

Crawfish swallowed hard and blushed a bit more. He said nothing just looked back at Alcide and then smiled and winked at her.

She turned to Alcide " I'll see you in a bit?"

He nodded his head and she walked out the door patting the soon to be done in door frame as she went. She found Mr. Longbrook outside by the pool. Things were right on schedule and the pool and deck should be ready by the end of the week. This thrilled her to no end. She couldn't wait to beat the heat with a good long swim in a cool pool. With all the men surrounding her these days though she wasn't sure how much swimming she should be doing. Putting a show on for the construction crew may not be the best of ideas. But then again......An idea began to form in the back of her head as she rounded the house and looked to the picnic tables to find that Alcide was already sitting there. Two bottles of Lemon Snapple iced tea in front of him. She smiled widely and walked purposefully towards him. He had put on a pair of sunglasses himself so she could not see the look in his eye but his head never moved and inch as she made her way to him. She sat down and grabbed one of the teas snapping the top off and reading the saying underneath

" A full moon is nine times brighter than a half moon" The irony of the saying was not lost on either of them. " How fascinating is that? I love a full moon don't you?" She searched Alcide's face for any tell sign but he kept his cool.

Instead of answering her question he picked up his lid and read it " The typewriter was invented in 1867 in Milwaukee Wisconsin. " Now that is fascinating" Alcide took another long swig drowning the bottle along with his sarcasm.

Rebecca reached over and took the cap out of his hand. " I'll have you know that I find that piece of important history very fascinating. The typewriter was a very important invention. It may be obsolete now but it lead to the keyboard which I happen use on a daily basis." Alcide just smirked and pulled another bottle of Snapple out of his overall pocket. He had one shoulder unhooked and the muscles in his chest were peaking through the thin material of his wife beater. Holy hell she thought do stare at his nipple DO NOT stare at his nipple. Despite herself she did just that and of course he caught her. He got a "you like what you see" grin on his face and she looked back at him through hooded eyes and a sly smirk of her own.

" So you liking my Snapples there Mr Herveaux?" He finished off another bottle slamming it down on the tabletop like a shot glass.

" Not half bad. Never had one before. Mason said they were your favorite since you've been living up in Yankee land and they don't know bout sweet tea up there. How'd a country breed girl such as yourself end up in New York City anyway?"

" Timing and circumstance. I may have been born a country girl but I've got a city girls heart" She twirled the lid around in circles on the table.

He looked around himself " If that is so why are you here? This isn't exactly big city living?" He pulled out another Snapple from his other pocket. Really? she thought. He's gonna have to piss like a russian race horse in a few minutes and he was drinking her yankee tea like it was water. Instead of drinking it though he popped the top and handed it over to Rebecca.

" You still look a bit green. Hydration will do you good" She thanked him and took a small sip and squelched the desire to read the top of the new bottle.

" Your right this isn't big city living but it was my choice to come here. It was my choice to leave home and go to New York. I loved it there. I intend to go back and spend time there. I have a business there and friends and I found happiness there. But this place has haunted my dreams since I was a child. I fought long and hard to get it and now that it is mine I want to make it my home." Her father had died over six years ago. He had left it to her in his will, her Mother had contested it. She had wanted no part of this land or any of her kin living it it. She knew her Mother had her reasons. She knew she had seen danger in this place for Rebecca. But her Mother had dictated to much of her life already and she had listened and still come out on the wrong side of things. This house was a symbol of her independence from her Mother's reign. In the Mother's eye she remained a Maiden. It did not matter that her powers far surpassed the woman who bore her. Her mothers knowledge was great, her influence untested, her control absolute.

" Me and the boys are gonna do our best to make that happen for you" Alcide looked at her as if he understood exactly how she felt. " Everyone wants a place to call their own. Ain't nothing wrong with that Rebecca"

" Thanks Alcide. I appreciate it." the phone in her pocket started to vibrate. She pulled it out and took a look at the caller id. She turned the screen toward Alcide " Sookie, she called me a couple of times yesterday"

" She came by to. Right after I left you she pulled up in the drive. I told her you were sick. She seemed really anxious to talk to you. I take it you to hit it off? There was more than one question being asked. He wanted to know what had been said about him already and what would be said in the future. Sookie was a Alcide "what if" and he wasn't sure if he wanted a "what if" talking to a "maybe"

" We have some things in common." I gave him a wink which made him jump back a bit in his seat. " I promised I'd come by Merlottes and introduce myself proper. Seems new people moving in to the neighborhood cause quite a stir."

" All the extra traffic and a crew of vampires might have something to do with it." he observed.

She pursed her lips together " Your probably right about that one. But it's not like they haven't ever seen a vampire before and Mason and his crew have not been in town. They have kept a very low profile"

" Yeah and you'd think that would be better but round here people are more worried about what they hear about and don't see, ya get my meaning?"

"I do" The thought that hit her by the pool continued to grow. " Then you think that it would be better if we all showed ourselves"

" Yes. I'm not saying those who hate the idea of vampires are going to change their minds but they may be less likely to cause trouble. There have been problems with Hunters around these parts. Selling V is big business and I'd hate to see any of your boys end up feeding junkies fixes."

His hands that had been sitting casually on the table were now clenched in tight fists. Alcide's ex-girlfriend was a V-head. Addiction had taken her away from him and into the arms of another Were and now he had little faith that she could be saved. He had loved her and even now after everything that had happened the last few months he wanted to save her. He hated himself for still feeling anything for her after what she had done. But he couldn't help it big intimidating on the outside Alcide Herveaux had a savior complex. A softy with a heart of gold. A good guy who always finished last. And here he was sitting in front of a woman he had known four days and thinking he would do the same for her. He hated himself for that to. He thought of it as a weakness. Rebecca hoped that she would be worthy of the feeling.

" I appreciate the advice and the warning. I know that Mason and the boys can take care of themselves but if letting the people of Bon Temps meet us would keep any confrontations from accruing I am all for it. The last thing that any of us would want is for someone to end up hurt because of ignorance or stupidity."

Inwardly she thought if anyone dared to touch them the most merciful thing that could happen to them would to be drained and thrown in the bayou. She had little patience for those who used vampires for highs and even less for those who killed them out of fear and bigotry. The thought planted in her head by the pool earlier began to sprout. The pool and the deck should be done by Friday. Maybe I should throw a little get together to let everyone get a look at the place. A barbeque by the pool sounded like the best option as the house was nowhere near ready for visitors. She started to make a mental list of everything she would need to make it happen. She should be able to get everything together by Sunday.

She would need some help but it could be done. It wouldn't have to be anything especially fancy just some good food,loud music and free flowing booze.

"You got plans this Sunday Alcide?"

He slid his shades down his nose " You asking me out?" He gave her a deeply dimpled grin.

She gave him her best "you wish look " That would be highly unappropriated behavior and grounds for a sexual harassment lawsuit. She put her hand to her chest and looked appalled at the very suggestion.

"No I have decided that I am going to throw a pool party on Sunday. I'll head into town tonight. Go to Merlotte's to see Sookie and invite everyone to come. I'd like it if you and your men would join in. To thank them for finishing their first week."

"I got no plans, was just going to sit in front of the tube with a six pack and watch baseball. I guess a party with free food and girls in bikinis sounds like a good time" The walkie at his hip let out a blast of static and then a cajun twang called out asking for his location. He answered and said he'd be right in. " Well duty calls. Thanks for the Yankee tea and the conversation." He stood and as he did so he pulled his suspender back in place and started walking back towards the house.

She had turned sideways on the bench and was watching him go when he turned around and called her name. "Yes Alcide?" "

"You do know that it is only harassment if I don't like it right?" He gave me a perfectly evil side grin and turned back around and within a few long strides disappeared from view.

She called Sookie and after exchanging pleasantries and apologies agreed to meet up with her that night at Merlotte's. She told Sookie of her plan for the party and found her new neighbor giddy about the prospect. Seemed the only excitement that had happened in Bon Temps the last few months had been bad. Sookie did her best to dance around the details as she wasn't quite sure what Rebecca's story was yet. How much Rebecca knew and how much she should tell her. So she did the best she could not to put her foot in her mouth though it was all quite fruitless since Rebecca could read every truth that she hid behind a falsehood. First there had been a serial killer running around killing girls who had relationships with vampires. Sookie got quiet for a moment while she said a prayer for her Grandmother who had been killed by mistake. It was supposed to have been her. Her relationship with Bill had made her a target. Another reason to regret ever getting involved with him. FUCKING LIAR!! She had ended up taking the killers head off with a shovel.

Then a Maenad (Hadn't heard of one of those in a while) had come to town and people had lost time and their minds and her boss Sam had tricked her and ended up with her heart in his hands. Which was WAY FUCKING GROSS. Sookie's mind went from one place to another so quickly Rebecca wasn't quite sure she got everything but she'd got enough to know that the shit had been hitting the fan. It explained why the town folk were weary of new people ( and what they knew about was but a fraction of what was going on) and even though they didn't quite trust the new vampires in their myst they were at least the devil already known. Rebecca's mind was racing after finally hanging up with Sookie and she stepped out onto the small deck Mason had added to the back of the trailer and contemplated on what to do with the rest of her afternoon. She was still out of sorts from the day before. Her breakdown had left her unbalanced and she could still feel the negative vibes reverberating through her body. She'd been under so much stress the last few weeks. She supposed that there was no way she could have continued on as she had without letting some of the souring energy growing inside her out. She had been remiss in her practice and she was grateful that her Goddess was such a forgiving sort. She stepped back inside the trailer and grabbed a pen and a few pieces of paper. She took a seat at the table on the deck and drew a circle in the middle of the paper. She then started segmenting off the circle into different aspects of her current daily life. When she finished she sat back and studied what she had drawn. Her life was overwhelmed by the construction of the house and all the prep work that had gotten her to this point. The different segments related to this one subject took up more than half the circle. Food,sleep,practice and play were but slivers. Love and friendship were practically non-existent. The reason for that laid in the words written between the second biggest segment of the circle, Coming to terms with the past.

She sat back in her chair and closed her eyes. The last few years had been spent immersing herself in one project after another. She has been running and hiding for so long. Perhaps it was time to stop and look around her and truly work on rearranging the pieces of her puzzle. She brought another piece of paper in front of her and redrew her circle.

Once finished she lay her hand on the paper and aloud she spoke.

" Goddess, help bring balance into all areas of my life." She waved her hand over the paper turning it into nettles from a dandelion.

She called a breeze to blow the nettles into the sky. " So be it."

She prayed for the strength and guidance she would need to move forward. She felt more at ease after completing the balancing spell. Her mind was less cluttered and her thoughts ran clear. But her body still felt stiff and heavy so she decided to draw herself a healing bath. She should have done it this morning and would have if she had been thinking straight. But instead she found herself sitting on the edge of her tub for the second time that day. This time she sat in the dark the only light coming from the white candle she lit and placed on the side of the tub next to her. She turned on the water letting it run through her fingers. Once she found the desired temperature she cast in some salt and poured in a oil made of sandalwood,violets and narcissus. She took off all her clothes and stepped into the steaming tub. She laid back and relaxed her body. She breathed in deeply and visualized the warm water seeping into her pores and flowing through her skin. It moved through each part of her body sterilizing and pushing out all of the stress and disease. She lay still and silent waiting until the water was cold and felt the water teeming with negativity and as she pulled the plug she chanted " The sickness is flowing out of me, Into the water, down to the sea". She stayed in the tub until it was completely empty and then stood and turned on the shower. She scrubbed and scrubbed letting the fresh water cleanse her of any residual illness released into the bath. She toweled herself off and then slipped a cotton chemise over her head and crawled into her bed. She could use a nice nap before heading out for the evening. As her eyes grew heavy and she nodded off she imagined the sleep piece of her pie growing just a tiny bit bigger.

A couple of hours of dreamless REM sleep later Rebecca stood in front of the mirror on her bathroom door scrutinizing her appearance. She had decided on a teal colored maxi dress with a chunky carnelian necklace. She'd pulled her hair back from her face with a black headband and slipped on a pair of black opened toed wedges. Never one to wear much make-up tonight she had put on just a bit of blush and a strawberry flavored lip gloss. It was one of those throwbacks of youth that she had never quite been able to give up. She thought she looked put together without trying to hard. She might be a bit over dressed for where she was headed but she figured that everyone would be looking at her and it would do her no good to look like a bum. First impressions were everything and Rebecca felt she was going to have to try extra hard to win over some of the people in this town. She grabbed the black shrug she planned to put on to cover the girls and headed for the front door. Once outside she scanned the front yard to see who was around. Most of the crew had already called it a day but there were several stragglers one of which was Alcide as his van was still parked nearby. She was deciding on whether to walk up to the house or take off when she saw him come out onto the porch with Crawfish. They talked for a minute and then Crawfish hoped off the porch and headed to his truck. As he passed her he slowed down and leaned out his window.

" Looking good Miss Rebecca. Looking REAL good". He gave her his gap toothed grin and a wave and gunned it out of sight. Well she thought I've at least got Crawfish's seal of approval.

" You a bit fancy for Merlotte's ain't ya?" Alcide was striding towards her now biceps blazing, both suspenders down.

His wife-beater was damp with sweat and covered in dirt. He might have thought she looked a bit made up for a dive bar but that didn't mean he didn't think she looked good. She was showing a lot a skin and he was beginning to feel tortured by the sight of the curves of her breasts. He was dirty and dead tired but he still felt himself stiffen at the mere sight of her standing there. Pleased and just as tortured by the sight of him she leaned over the railing of the stairs and called back.

" Don't know never been to Merlotte's" she pitched her head and her thumb back at the trailer door."Maybe I should go back inside an see if I can find something a bit more like your current ensemble."

" They'll be looking more like me and less like you that's for sure" He stopped just a few feet away and with his height she could have reached out and rumpled his ravened hair. She resisted the urge, instead she leaned over even further and teasing him two ways said,

" You wanna come with me. I figure your extremely dirty ass will counter act my extremely so fresh and so clean ass and maybe we will fit right in" She popped her imaginary collar and wiped imaginary dirt off her shoulder.

He wanted to go with her in fact he couldn't think of anything that would make him happier than spending a night on her arm but he had to get back to Shreveport for a meeting. Apparently a new Were had moved into town and tonight he was going to be introduced into the pack. As the pack leaders son he needed to be there and as it was he was already risking being late by standing here talking to her.

" Sorry I got to get back home. Got a family thing. Maybe another time?"

She came down the stairs " Of course any time you want."

She knew all to well that pack business was pack business but she still felt a tinge of disappointment that he couldn't come along. One way or another though tonight she was going to have a good time. Putting a bit of fun back into her life was now a top priority. The little devil on her shoulder nodded his head and gave her a quick poke in her bare shoulder with his pitchfork.

They walked together towards her car. Once there she leaned against the rear drivers side door and asked " Everything go according to plan today?

" Right on schedule. I left Mason a rundown. You can start in the kitchen tomorrow if you want to."

" That's great news. I am glad you all had a productive day" Rebecca fought off the urge to ask more questions. If anything went wrong or if he needed her help he would ask. Letting Go. Letting Go. Letting Go... Repeated over and over in her head. He opened the car door for her and she ducked under his arm to climb inside. She placed her bag and sweater on the seat next to her and turned back to Alcide. His eyes shifted from her body to her face and then to the car hood. She grinned and shook her head, he was a man like any other.

" Well I guess I will see you tomorrow?"

He closed the door and replied " Yes Ma'am bright and early."

He leaned over and put his head in the window. " You have a great time tonight. Tell Sookie I said Hello" he pulled his head out and then back in "Oh and don't worry you'll knock um dead for sure"

He gave her another appreciative once over his hair falling into his eye. This this time Rebecca didn't hesitate. She reached up and brushing his forehead with the tips of her fingers she swept the hair up and back on his head. She let her hand linger for a moment pressing the tips of her nails into his scalp. She felt a shudder go through him as she slowly removed her hand" Goodnight Alcide."

He gave her his half smile. "Goodnight Rebecca" He kept eye contact as he moved out of the window and she backed out of her spot. She knew that he stood in the driveway with his hands in his pockets long after the taillights of her car had rounded the bin.

Alcide

Alcide did indeed stand on the side of the drive for several minutes. He was trying to calm his rapidly beating heart and shake off the pain in his groin. It had been a while since any woman had touched him and Rebecca's bold yet gentle caress had left him reeling. He ran his hand through his hair retracing the exact route she had taken. He could still feel the tips of her fingers brushing his forehead and the sting of her nails as they just pierced his scalp. He couldn't help but imagine the feel of those nails running down chest or his back as he moved slowly in and out of her. She was sexy and mysterious and she was driving him crazy. She had looked him directly in the eye when she'd touched him and while he had been stunned by her actions he hadn't taken his eyes off her for a moment. Her green eyes shined mischievously and her lips which smelled of strawberries were slightly parted and he could see the tip of her tongue peaking out between her teeth. She was playing with him but there was no way she didn't feel at least some of the chemistry that was growing between them. Her hand was shaking just slightly and he could hear her heart beating faster. When she had whispered goodnight to him she stumbled over the word and had exhaled extra hard like she'd been holding in her breath the entire time. She had hesitated putting the car into reverse as if giving him a moment to say something or do something and now standing there alone he wished he had.

What the hell was happening to him? A week ago he had been wallowing in self pity. Trying to resolve himself to the fact that the woman he had loved for so long was gone for good and wondering why the hell he always ended up on the short end of the stick. A momentary flirtation with Sookie had made him realized he was tired of always finishing last. Being a nice guy with woman had never paid off. He wanted nothing to do with the bullshit. The games and the fighting. The constant back and forth. It was exhausting and Alcide had resigned himself to spending some time on his own. No woman was worth it. He was lonely and rejected and his self esteem was in the crapper. He figured he'd stay the hell away from the temptations of the female form for a while or maybe just go out and have a bit of fun like every other guy seemed to be able to do. He'd never been one for casual sex but maybe it was time to be more like a stereotypical male. He could be a asshole, use um and lose um and not look back. At least that was what he had been telling himself. But everything had changed the moment he had saw her standing on that porch four days ago. She had caught him off guard and being near her was like someone punching him in the solar plexus. He couldn't breath or think straight whenever he was near her. He felt like he was back in high school trolling for his first girlfriend. He had never been one to believe in love at first sight,lust yes but love no and while he was lusting after her badly he knew that once he had her he wouldn't be able to let her go. Who was this girl and how was it she doing this to him? He'd never experienced anything like it. He felt like he had been bewitched and was walking around in a fog. Life really could change in the blink of an eye. Alcide was hopeful again for the first time in months. He hoped that he was right about her as he felt exhilarated and renewed and he liked it. He didn't want it to end.

The last of his men drove by him, his crew chief Max stopping to see if he was okay. He nodded and sent him on his way with a pound of a fist on the hood. He needed to get going himself. He was already going to be late and still needed to go home and get cleaned up. He rolled down the window and cranked the music loud hoping it would help to clear his head. He wasn't looking forward to tonight. Pack meetings were always a bear and but the current situation with his Father made it worse. He was getting tired of cleaning up his fathers messes. Being the responsible one in the business and in the family. His father was pack leader which garnered him much respect and admiration and people saw him as being an upstanding honest man. For the most part they were right but his fathers addiction was taking it's toll on all aspects of his life and putting additional strain on Alcide and their relationship. So far he had been able to keep the truth of his fathers problem from the pack but he wasn't sure he would be able to for much longer. He grew tired of the cover up and the jobs he had to take for Eric in order to clear his fathers ever increasing debts. He didn't like being indebted to a bloodsucker. Especially one who was as big a dick as Eric Northman. His last gig had been protecting Sookie while she tried to find her vampire lover Bill. He'd ended up dealing with multiple kidnappings,crazed jealous vampire makers and murders perpetrated by v-addicted Weres and protective girlfriends. He'd watched his ex get initiated into another pack throwing herself at a man who shared and fueled her addiction. Allied with the King of Mississippi they had been responsible for kidnapping Bill.

Alcide shook his head and slammed his hands on the steering wheel. He'd hated seeing Debbie like that and he wished things were different but she had made her choice and he had to let her go. He worried that she wasn't gone from his life for good though. She and Sookie had butted heads and Sookie had made a very angry enemy when she had stood up to and for him with Debbie. She was an angry bitter fucking unstable junkie and there was no telling what she would do next. He hadn't sensed Debbie around recently. She was laying low but he did wonder if she would come looking for trouble at Sookie's and end up finding her way to Rebecca's. Debbie didn't want him but she didn't want anyone else to have him either. If she showed her her ass with Rebecca he didn't know what he would do. He didn't want any harm to come to any of them but he'd do what he had to do if necessary. Debbie's instability caused unwanted attention to her kind.

The two natured still guarded their privacy and preferred to keep their existence under wraps. How much longer that would last he did not know there was a push amongst the two natured to come out just as the vampires had. He wasn't sure he was okay with it but it wasn't up to him. He supposed it would be nice to not hide what he was especially when it came to his future family and relationships. The few relationships he'd had with regular woman had never worked. To many secrets to keep and eventually they become to much. He thought again of Rebecca. If he started something with her he'd have those same worries. Or would he? Rebecca was very close to Mason and had no problem being around vampires. She clearly had known of their existence before they came out and she was excepting and that made him hopeful that she would not be bothered by him being a werewolf. There was even a chance that she already knew about his kind. He just wasn't sure he could tell her. That he should tell her. Letting her into his world would open up her up for a whole other sort of trouble and something told him that Rebecca had already seen enough pain in her lifetime. Last night seeing her lying so still on the floor, her eyes dead and full of tears. The way she had held on to Mason and how he whispered that she would be alright. That was not the first time Mason had seen her like that. He didn't even flinch when they broke open the door. He'd just picked her up and carried her away. Desperate to shield and protect her from anyone else's gaze. He had paced in the living room waiting for Mason to return and trying in vain to listen to their conversation. When he came back Mason had told him she was fine just worn down and in need of sleep. But he'd known Mason hadn't been truthful, his voice had been calm and his tone light but his face and body language told him that he was worried. Mason and Rebecca shared a silent language and a history. Rebecca had secrets of her own. Another skin that she wore under the smiling happy version he saw this afternoon. Everyone had a past,parts of themselves that they would like to forget or sweep under the rug. He wanted to know her but he wouldn't push Rebecca to find out her secrets mainly because he didn't want to disclose his own.

He pulled up to his apartment complex and as he walked toward his building he felt someone watching him. His ears picked up and he stopped to look around. He peered into cars and into apartment windows but saw no one and nothing out of the ordinary. Still he could not shake the feeling. He'd have to alert just in case. His apartment was dark and empty. All of the life had been sucked out of this place when he and Debbie had gone south. Now it was just a place to lay his head at night. He supposed that he should move and start fresh in a place of his own. He just didn't have the time or strength to deal with it now. He stripped off his clothes throwing them in the pile growing in one corner of his bedroom. One of the advantages to having the apartment to himself was he could come and go as he pleased. Throw his clothes and wet towels on the floor and he never had to worry about putting the toilet seat down. He got a whiff of himself when he reached to turn on the shower and wrinkled up his nose. He stank and was glad he hadn't taken Rebecca up on her invitation and wondered how she was able to stand touching him as filthy as he was. He worked quickly scrubbing every inch watching dirt filled water go down the drain. When he got to his crotch he nearly jumped out of his skin. He fully admitted to being sexually frustrated. It had been months since he'd had sex. In fact it was the change in his and Debbie's sex life that had alerted him of trouble. Debbie had been a fiend in the sack. They were cut from the same cloth in that aspect and he could take her anytime and in anyway. Debbie was always game, until she wasn't. At first he'd been okay with all of the other emotions running through him he didn't even think about it. When he did start thinking about it he found release in a few minutes of porn.

But since meeting Rebecca his balls were bright blue and he got hard when anything brushed up against his junk. Now he found that touching himself in the shower was more than enough to get him going. He let the washcloth drop and took matters into his own hands. He leaned against the shower wall and let the hot water run down his body while he stroked. He thought about how great Rebecca had looked in that dress and what she would look like out of it and imagined it was her hand on his dick and not his. It didn't take long before he's body ceased up and he let out a loud grunt. He stood under the water for another few minutes stoking gently,enjoying the feeling that flowed through him. He stopped only when he realized he would have to go again if he didn't. He was going to end up with hairy palms full time if he didn't get laid soon. He dressed quickly and with his hair still dripping down his back headed out back out. He wasn't looking forward to his evening so he might as well get it over with. He hoped Rebecca enjoyed her evening more than he was going to.

Songs of inspiration.